Last weekend we caught one of our favorite movies is ‘Far and Away’ on one of the movie channels and one of the lines that I remember most from that movie is “Toe the line, gentlemen!” This is in reference to two Boxers about to face off but in the case of dealing with your family, it can much be the same…
I know that it is really, really hard to let your kids fall but occasionally it is necessary and it’s going to happen whether we like it or not. When your kids get to a certain age (most moms I know think this is around age 10 but each case is different for what we might be talking about here) it might be time to start with a little “tough love”.
Here are a few circumstances that I’m thinking of…
Make your own breakfast
Snack before practice
Tennis shoes for gym
If your kids know that there will be consequences (detention) then they will automatically be inclined to avoid such consequences. Why work against this? Instead, when your son or daughter calls because they forgot their sneakers and will have to stay for detention & take the late bus home, let them! It isn’t the end of the world by any means and I can promise that they will remember them next time.
Consider the second option… you bail them out and then the next time it happens, you are in a meeting and they expect you to come in with their sneakers & the drama ensues. Nip it in the bud the first time, every chance you can…
Bottom line: if it is important to them (they never forget the date that a new version of COD is being released), they will remember. The world is not going to end if they have to take the late bus or have to run an extra lap at practice. They are going to have to learn to take responsibility for themselves. I always figured it was better for them to learn how to be responsible sooner rather than having to learn all of this at once when they get to college!
How does this sound? Is this a completely foreign concept or do your teenagers manage to get what they need to/from school on their own?